drink counters/drink assholes

dam clubs are just too fuckin easy to find all sorts of ammo. sometimes i just think maybe i should leave these people alone and let them live their lives, but someone has to tell them how fuckin stupid they sound and look. and hey you should be doing the same. if you think what i am writing is retarted then let me know. i wont fuckin care but at least i know that some people dont like it. so let me get to these clubbing assholes that count their drinks. i guess this can happen at parties too but it tends to happen more at clubs because i think they are saying it so that they can "impress" people. you know the people who try to convince you that they are drunk by listing the drinks that they had. "bro" they are usually always these people that say bro...i know i started on that awhile back but its the same people. im telling you there are trends here that we have to pick up on. anyways "bro..i had 3 shots of vodka, 2 beers, a rhum and coke oh ya ya and another shot after with this guy that i know over there..im so wasted". first off my argument, you are not in fact wasted if you can remember all that. second, congratufuckinlations, no one give 2 shits how many you drank compared to how drunk you are. if i see you throw up ill beleive you, if i nkow who you are and you do uncharacteristic things ill beleive you are drunk. if you name all the drinks you did have then your just a jackass. if i ask you what did you drink and you tell me then fine, but the people i am talking about go around announcing it to every person they see. and everytime they have another drink they add it to the list tat they seem to have memorized because maybe by some miracle it will impress someone that over hears it. i have tough news for you kid, no one is impressed and people are looking at you because your the loud obnoxious jerk thats ruining everyones good time. there are of course other ways to be an obnoxious jerk (trust me i know because i have played the role before to some critical acclaim) but this drink counter is by far the worst. dont be an asshole. but as bad as you are, there are of course worse. and thats the one i call the drink asshole. i could put this in another post but it seems to me that they go hand in hand because it is iften the same person at the same party that plays both roles. this drink asshole is the guy that holds the bottle like its his child and goes around trying to pour it into people's mouths. wow dude you are so cool i cant even take it anymore. please turn on the heating a tad cause this guy is cooling the whole place off. how bout you take that bottle and dance with it on the dance floor...oh wait you do. how bout you pose and take pictures of you with the bottle...oh wait you do. god dam man, you would think that its a girl you are trying to hook up with. do you take the bottle home after the club? you pretend to be the busboy once its finished and go put it in your car for later? like you seriously are the biggest loser of everyone in the club. you and the 5 other people that are doing the same thing around their own bottles. what if i were to take that bottle and shove it in your face? you think youd like that? and then these idiots try to force it down on people, thats the worst part. no is not enough for them, usually takes a good punch to the gut, why not? its wide open while they have their right arm lifted to the heavens trying to pour the contents of that bottle down your gullet. the sad part is that these people will never stop, because usually people just open their mouths, and thats fine, your there to get drunk so you drink it, but ha;f the poeple do it just because they dont want to TRY to get this moron to not pour it down. and thats why it wont end, and thats why they will continue to think that they are cool, and thats why i am here so you can fuckin know that you arent and that of course you are a drink asshole.